Kiss and say good bye!


That we’re interdependent, needing each other and one another is a statement of fact yet sometimes, somehow, it pays to kiss and say good bye. Someone once said, “If rape is inevitable, a wise woman should lie down and enjoy it.” In the same vein, dissociation can actually be better than association. It’s better to divorce and be alive than to die in abusive relationship, marriage.

You can force yourself to love someone but you cannot force someone to love you. When it becomes clear that your presence or contributions cause more pains than soothe the balm; when it’s obvious that secret meetings are being summoned and held just because of you; when different laws could be made and shabbily implemented because you are involved; when people have insomnia and amnesia in thinking of you; when your presence brings about silence and fear…, the best thing to do would be to leave everyone with harmful and murderous divergent view and pinch your tent where you are needed and appreciated. It doesn’t worth it to make sacrifices for those who don’t appreciate sacrificial instinct and cost. It’s a pure waste throwing bags of salt into the ocean, may be to appease mermaids that don’t need salts, when many malnourished people are in dare need of same.

When people gather for group interest, a closer look would reveal divergent personal interests with the hidden intent to manipulate others. Yes, behind every group interest is someone’s over riding personal interest – and the dominant director can stop at nothing to push forward his personal interest and morbid ambition even at the expense of the group members and the group itself.

There’s always a dominant aspiration that produces a dominant director who can do anything to actualize his gross ambition and in doing so, anything can go with rights trampled upon and rules thrown to the dogs. This type of character should be kept at arm’s length or stopped at all cost for evil communication corrupts good manners and the union with evil doer is the shortcut to perdition. Those who have gone out to belong without prior information and adequate preparation got themselves burnt!

Anything that can poison or smear your mindset should be avoided. Keep away from anyone whose work is to sow seeds of discord, subtly promoting division and enmity. Avoid every relationship that can put a demand on your loyalty and smear your conscience. There’s actually nothing anyone can eat and swallow the teeth along with it. The only constant thing is change.

Do things that promote peaceful coexistence even if it means to stand alone and fight the cabals that make equity, peace, unity and justice very elusive. Resist the policy and system that create division through the ploy of “we against them.” Expose those who create chaos and turn around to feed on it. Command and control doesn’t work so can’t pay. It’s a pity that some people have penchant to destroy whatever they cannot benefit from however good and edifying such might be to others – even the majority. Look inward and you will see how abnormal is decorated to become normal – the new normal which is but absolute abnormality. There’s always a contest to legalize illegality and the proponents can stop at nothing to get it done. Truth can be stood on its head just for selfish gain(s). These and many more make living painfully insecure what with being condemned by one’s conscience.

When you are averse to evil, you would have many enemies that can stop at nothing to crush you if only you give them the permission. At the other end are pretended friends who lurk around for the proceeds of your principle stand but would not waste a second to prove their worth when the opportunity comes. An open enemy is better than a pretended friend but keep both at arm’s length. Distance yourself from them if you want to grow and prosper, having along peace of mind. The animal called man can be funny most times.

The inductive nature of human being is a good reminder for caution. That evil communication corrupts good manners and the association with ill company leads to ill behaviours should make one to be selective and cautious. Don’t join for joining sake. It’s dangerous to belong because your friends, colleagues and associates are belonging. There’s always time for accountability and rewards – and they are personal.

To get even, some would conveniently put up with self denial; to belong, some have sold their conscience; and just to be heard some consciously embraced self affliction. It’s the height of shamefulness for someone to steal, loot and embezzle public fund under his care and turn around to dance and sermonize for the ignorant simpletons, blaming imaginary enemies for his woes! It’s now the norm to enrich oneself with public fund in public office and turn around to attack those who refused to play ball. The strife for self aggrandizement is the reason people do anything for power – and with the sedation of power, they become worse than beasts. Keep away from power mongers and those that urge them on – they have no shame and as such can do anything, anytime…

Beloved, why are we here? What’s the primacy of our existence? What’s the true essence of living? The end does not always justify the means.

By Livy – Elcon Emereonye

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